This last week I’ve been working on a three-part series based on yearbook memories from elementary school and junior high. What I’ve found interesting about the process is this:
Yearbooks are a kind of clear fiction we willingly pretend is true.
Yearbooks are a kind of clear fiction we willingly pretend is true.
A manilla envelope in my box: evaluations. I opened it and thumbed through the pages, noticing (and skipping) those which stayed inside predictable boxes: the perfect column of “exceeds expectations,” the zig-zag alternation between 3’s and 4’s intended to suggest real thought, and of course the completely blank. Two evaluations caught my eye, however. Both had single sentences below the same question: Does the instructor exhibit enthusiasm for his subject?
“…entered / the sound everywhere, gathered like glass, boozy with gold.”
You are filled and then you’re not. A poet is someone who has to exist between those moments. And between those moments you don’t feel like a poet. It’s been two months since I’ve written a poem and I don’t feel at all like a poet. It goes away. You’re just a person going about your life like anyone else. The gift seems not yours. It seems on loan. Whereas with prose you can do that anytime. You can crank that out.
-successful poems come from some source of inspiration outside the poet
-drafting, revising, rewriting—if you’re in between periods of being “filled” these things are of little use
-poets are gifted in a unique way, even from other creative writers (which raises a whole different set of questions)
-prose writers are never “filled” and don’t need to wait for those moments
-prose writers can and should feel like writers all the time
-most alarmingly, you can write successful prose anytime and just crank it out
UPDATE: Christian Wiman, I can’t quit you
It may be the case that God calls some people to unbelief in order for faith to take new forms.